Gross (note the capital G)

I was under the impression that certain kinds of mating patterns were more common to, say, possums, than human beings. But when you're so fucking crazy that the words "labial reconstruction" no longer have meaning, you can shoot out as many fucking humans as you darn well please!

Take, for example, Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar.

(Hey, I wonder if they do requests. If so, I want to hear "Living Dead Girl", "Flies on my Dick", or maybe "They're Coming to Take me Away, Ha Ha".)
They and the small army they are constructing for themselves are living happily in Arkansas. Michelle is a walking uterus. Her vagina is the shape of a baby, just plopping them out onto a conveyer belt; further down the line they'll recieve their suit, tie, bible, a harmonica (or whatever instrument God tells them to play), and a sandwich for the road. And they're gonna like it.

In case you hadn't noticed, all of their names start with the letter J. That means that sooner or later, on kid 115 or so, they're going to completely run out of J names and start resorting to Jrichard or Jstephanie. Better yet, start numbering them, you damn loons. Those kids, especially the older ones, are getting really, REALLY tired of hearing their parents having sex like rabbits all the time. How do they sleep?

Also, I can't imagine having this many mouths to feed. They must line them up in a trough or keep them in kennels. Are they going to start a colony somewhere? Are these children going to be raised to start an elite squad of ninjas, or just an annoying band of solicitors? Is this some kind of welfare plot to take my money? Who knows? More importantly, who knows how to stop them before they're out of control?